Comments on: Is There Such a Thing as a Moral Abortion?

By: MInTheGap

MInTheGap — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 12:59:54 +0000

@Thrifty Karen: It’s definitely a hard thing to show love. If you think about it, there are a bunch of people that have bound together in a church to seek after God– and people tend to like rules. The only thing I think that they like better than rules is knowing the rules better than others!

So, what you have is a bunch of people trying to be like God finding rules on how to please him and preaching those rules and teaching those rules, and not everyone is at the same level. It’s not to say the rules are wrong, but we were saved from the law and into grace.

It’s like Romans 14 says, there will be some that will choose to follow some rules because they believe it will please God– and some that know that there is liberty from those rules and they know that they are living to please God. The two groups should not be judging each other. (Of course we’re not talking clear sin issues here…)

We should be encouraging one another, and causing one another to produce good works. We should be picking up the fallen brother, dusting him off, and setting him back on the right trail. That means forgiving and forgetting how they got off the trail in the first place.

By: Thrifty Karen

Thrifty Karen — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 19:50:44 +0000

My husband has been a youth pastor for many years, and we’ve tried teaching the youth better than we were taught. Have you seen Pam Stenzel’s video “Sex Has a Price Tag”? It’s really good. I would definitely recommend it. There’s even a public school version. I think one of the series we did was “Good Sex”. I can’t remember the name of the other one. The series teach about STDs, peer pressure, the reasons girls give in, how to say no, how to keep yourself out of those situations, etc. I thought both series we used were pretty good. They definitely taught more than I was taught, which was basically “Don’t do it!”.

It is sad the way churches treat people. Definitely not a model of Christ’s love and forgiveness for us. It’s easy to see why people walk away from churches. Sometimes you just have to overlook all the crap because you know there’s good there. Thankfully, we’ve been blessed to attend some not-so-judgmental churches lately. They’re more about “how can we help you grow in your walk with Christ” than the other ones that seem to be, “Don’t mess up. We’ll kick you while you’re down.” I don’t think my parent’s church means to be that way, but they are. The self-righteous attitudes make me nauseous.

Thrifty Karens last blog post..Stay Tuned . . .

By: MInTheGap

MInTheGap — Thu, 19 Jun 2008 14:04:52 +0000

@Thrifty Karen: We had the unfortunate case of two girls in my old church having babies out of wedlock– and I can’t say they were handled very well, but that’s another story. They both gave public apologies to the church, and one was suspended from being in the choir for a time, but both were allowed to be married in the church.

It’s tough. It’s such a public sin when the baby is involved. It seems we don’t do enough in the church to try to encourage teens not to get that close. And no, preaching sermons about how sex before marriage is a sin is not enough. We all know what happens when emotions get involved. We need to teach how not to pair up, or what techniques to use to prevent us from getting to the place where we have to make that kind of choice.

And then we have to show love to them after. Not approval of the sin, but love of the sinner. We need to lovingly encourage them to get right with God (repent), and then work at restoring fellowship.

It’s sad how the church can treat people– but that’s because they have the wrong view of who God is and the people He sent His Son to die for.

By: Thrifty Karen

Thrifty Karen — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 23:05:41 +0000

Great comments! My cousin got pregnant out of wedlock and my mom was really disgusted at how the pastor’s wife treated my cousin and the baby.

Then there was another girl at my parent’s church that got pregnant out of wedlock. She married the guy, but the pastor refused to marry them or allow them to be married in the church. She had been faithful to that church for 19 years. She messed up. Then I had to listen to my mom call me every week after that and tell how once again the pastor slipped something into his message about unwed mothers, premarital sex, etc. The girl learned from her mistake. She didn’t need to be beaten up. It’s really sad.

I suppose to them it’s ok to marry someone who has premarital sex, so long as they don’t get pregnant. Geez.

Thrifty Karens last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: Enjoying the Lake

By: MInTheGap

MInTheGap — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 12:22:39 +0000

@militarywifey: Of course you’re right here, militarywifey. I think that the CareNet group has done a good job of moving past judgment to supplying unwed mothers with places to stay and supplies.

I think it’s hard for Christians to remember that they were once like the people that they judge. But for the grace of God.

Once the baby’s there, treat both the mother and the baby– don’t leave the mother out. She knows what she has done, and she’s bearing a reminder of it every day. She needs support.

By: militarywifey

militarywifey — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 11:07:26 +0000

This was a great post. I remember also “happening” upon that page a little while ago myself. It really struck me because it basically profiled stories of anti-abortion protestors who had abortions themselves and then went and protested abortion the next day.

Yes, it’s very hypocritical. And I’m not going to justify the behavior of these women but the Christian community has a tendency to be very judgemental. These women probably knew that most “Christians” would judge them for the fact that they were pregnant out of wedlock and the baby would be evidence over the fact that they had premarital sex. So they valued their shame and public reputation over the life of the unborn.

People in the Christian community should be more accepting of women who choose life despite the circumstances. Premarital sex is undoubtedly wrong, but there is no use crying over spilt milk and it’s useless for us to point the finger after the pregnancy already is. The least we can do is to offer these women love and care and refrain from being judgemental.

militarywifeys last blog post..The irrationality of fear

By: alicia

alicia — Fri, 13 Jun 2008 19:22:05 +0000

This is a question that I’ve been bumping up against lately; it seems no matter how I try to avoid it, there it is again. I believe abortion is murder. I also believe you can catch more flies with honey.
The pro-lifer who protested abortion after getting one was a hypocrite.
What do we do about people who believe a fertilized egg is not a human? How do you argue with that logic?
My answer has always been that protestors are wasting their time and doing the wrong thing; abortions are considered a choice because this world is such an ugly, unfeeling place where children are just not welcome and struggling families are not supported. To truly fight abortion, we have to do everything in our power to make this world a better place, a place where a struggling 16 year old or a mom facing the burden of a disabled child can feel that she will have the help and love of her fellow people.
I’m not making excuses for abortion; I still think it is wrong and I stand by my convictions. But I think it’s time for activists to be a little more, well, active. To show some mercy to their fellow human beings. Take in a pregnant mother or a disabled child. Make this world a better place for people. Not add to the shouting and judgmentalism that we already have had enough of.

alicias last blog post..No Worries