Standing in the Gap in a Society that's Warring with God.

101 Ways to Say “I Love You” Without Saying It

April 30th, 2007 Viewed 306780 times

This is What Love Looks Like
Often, we can remember to say “I Love You” and show it when we are young and first “fall in love” with each other, but when it gets to the point that you’ve been together for years, what you do and say that are not those three words mean more than saying them. That’s not to say that you shouldn’t tell your spouse you love them, but let me suggest (for the man and the woman) some ways that you can say I love you without saying it.


Connect Physically

  1. Hold her hand
  2. Giver her a back/neck massage
  3. Play with her hair
  4. Massage her feet
  5. Open her door
  6. Give her a hug
  7. Offer your arm
  8. Cuddle next to her while sitting down
  9. Put your arm around her neck
  10. Offer your shoulder for her head

Around the House

  1. Make the bed, before she gets to it
  2. Cook her a meal
  3. Vacuum the house
  4. Play her a song– a favorite of hers
  5. Do that project she’s been asking you about
  6. Do a project that you know needs to be done without her asking
  7. Change the infant’s diaper
  8. Go to sleep with her at night
  9. Let her sleep in while you watch the kids
  10. Buy her some flowers for display


  1. Leave notes around the house telling her how much you love her
  2. Write a message on the mirror with soap while she’s in the shower
  3. Call them from work just to talk (not during her nap
  4. Send her an e-mail card (but not too often)
  5. Write her a snail-mail letter and have it delivered to the house when you’re not there
  6. Call the grandparents to watch the kids for the night and surprise her by taking her out.
  7. Take the children out and let her have the day off
  8. Let her have a ladies night out
  9. Writer her a poem
  10. Help your kids to write her a banner or note


The problem I have here is that I know that wives are so often showing their love that it would take something out of the ordinary to be different, and yet I will list some things (and they’re probably dual purpose ūüėČ ).

Connect Physically

  1. Prepare his meals
  2. Run his house
  3. Help raise his kids
  4. Greet him at the door with a kiss
  5. Hold his hand
  6. Cuddle with him
  7. Give him a massage
  8. Lay your head on his lap the next time you’re watching television
  9. Walk over and sit on his lap
  10. Give him a back rub


  1. Give him some time to work on a project that he has been working on
  2. Talk to him about what interests him
  3. Sneak a note in with his lunch
  4. Call him and tell him that you are thinking about him
  5. Tell him that you appreciate what he does for the family
  6. Write a letter or something and leave it where he can find it.
  7. Get his favorite candy or treat just for him
  8. Talk good about him to your friends
  9. Talk good about him in front of him
  10. Encourage his dreams


  1. Obedience is the best way to show love
  2. Stand behind your parents decisions, even if you don’t agree
  3. Create something to give to them to display on the fridge
  4. Ask to help do something around the house that you don’t usually do
  5. Let your parents sleep in one day
  6. Share your favorite toy with your sibling
  7. Invite your brother/sister to come with you when going over to someone’s house
  8. Make something special for dad to take to work
  9. Spend some time helping a younger sibling learn something they are having trouble with
  10. Clean up your room without being asked.


  1. Stand up for your friend when he is alone
  2. Be truthful to a friend, even if it hurts
  3. Always make time to talk to a friend
  4. Always listen completely to what a friend has to say
  5. Be a part of the group that encourages your friend to follow his dream
  6. Remember his/her birthday
  7. Be there to help a friend move
  8. Be understanding when family must come first
  9. Talk positively about your friend when he is not around
  10. Be on the look out for things that may help your friend

Things you can say to that special someone

  1. I adore you
  2. I appreciate you
  3. There’s no one else I could ever want to be with
  4. My life is not the same without you
  5. I care about you
  6. Please be there for me
  7. I trust you
  8. I will never leave you
  9. I will always be there for you
  10. You complete me

Things you can say to your friend

  1. Thank you
  2. I couldn’t have done it without you
  3. I owe you more than you could possibly know
  4. Whatever you need done, I’ll do it
  5. Don’t worry, I’ll be there (and make it)
  6. I promise…
  7. I’ll be praying for you
  8. I’ll be there right away
  9. Don’t worry, I don’t have to go
  10. Drive Safely

Love Poems

  1. Love Spell
  2. Cinderella
  3. A Special World
  4. If I could…
  5. It’s You
  6. A Stranger Once
  7. The Jewel
  8. Never Have I Fallen
  9. Your Name
  10. Love

And 101 – Play the Randy Travis song “I’m Going to Love You Forever.”

Love Grown Up

Images from Stock Exchange used under the Standard Restrictions explained at the link.

Meet Them Where They Are

April 29th, 2007 Viewed 4973 times

An often misused piece of Scripture is Paul’s statement that he has become all things to all men that he might win some.¬† I say misused because people have taken this Scripture to give them liberty to do things that would harm the name of Christ and emphasizes a “ends justifies the means” mentality.

Still, it will no longer do to just sit in our churches and expect the unsaved to come to us looking for answers.  Seriously, there are few instances now where the unsaved are turning to the churches for anything. There is no natural respect for the church or what it stands for, and this generation does not have the desire to return to church.  Since this is the case, we need to be out meeting them where they are.

What Will You Leave Behind?

April 28th, 2007 Viewed 3210 times

Crying Girl

Newsweek recently featured the Iraq War in the words of those that have fought and died in it.¬† They took excerpts from letters over the total conflict and pieced together what was happening in different people’s lives during the time, occasionally injecting how the person died.¬† Every time you read a person talking about coming home, and then read that a week or a day before they were to go home they were killed, you were struck with awe and sorrow.

And yet it was the letters– complete letters– at the back of the issue that really hit home.¬† I believe that it’s a mandatory thing for each person going into a field of combat to write a “if you get this letter” letter.¬† There were a few such letters, and they were filled with encouragement and hope– many of them talking of being right with God and seeing their loved ones later.

What are you leaving behind for your children?  They say that there are two things that are certain: death and taxes.  Most of you have filed your taxes, what have you done for your death?

Have you gotten a will?  In some states if you have not spelled out what will happen with your estate should you and your spouse die the state gets it (including children) and they determine what is best.

But what are you leaving written to those that are left?  Not just have you told them your favorite songs for your funeral or what you want done, but have you written them something?  What would your youngest child know about their parent and their passion?

You cannot assume that you will never die.  What you will leave behind in the case of the unexpected is up to you.

Data Dump: Compacting, Purging and Simplifying Your Life

April 27th, 2007 Viewed 2756 times

50 Cent

Here’s some links on Compacting, Purging and Simplifying Your Life…

The Compacting Committment – Meg talks about the compacting commitment and looks at it from a Christian perspective.

Room to Breathe – Amy talks about how she simplifies her life by purging out extra toys and clothes. Wash them more, but have less makes it so it doesn’t get out of control, or so she says.

Steve Pavlina writes:

There are a few rules that have served me well whenever I go through a purge cycle:

1. When in doubt, throw it out.
2. Ask, ‚ÄúWhat would be the worst-case outcome if I threw this item out by mistake?‚ÄĚ If the answer is little or nothing, throw it out.
3. Could someone else benefit from this item more than I would?

Liss76 is purging this year, and keeping track of the amount in pounds!

Annie recommends having a toy garage sale for your children. They are much better at choosing what toys they really want than you think, and if you have older children let them know that they can pocket the profits.

Carol Keller talks about organizing one’s kitchen. Simply put, check out your current needs, weed out those things that are seldom used, throw out the things that don’t work.

airforcewife did something I don’t recommend, but understand. She purged while the husband was away because he wouldn’t. But she had the following advice that’s golden:

If you haven’t worn the clothes in the last two years, you do not need them (this is mainly a guideline for me). Pieces of fence chain from 1992 are really not necessary. And just how many stuffed animals are necessary for my kids’ survival? Apparently in excess of five thousand. Anything over that number and I send it to Goodwill.

Standing in the Gap Carnival – April 20, 2007

April 26th, 2007 Viewed 2723 times

Sorry that this is a little late! I must have missed the reminder.
Anyone wishing to host the next carnival, comment and let me know.

Welcome to the April 20, 2007 edition of standing in the gap.

Hueina Su presents The Most Important Relationship in Your Life posted at Intensive Care for the Nurturer’s Soul, saying, “Most people are either looking for love in all the wrong places, or entering/staying in a relationship for the wrong reasons. There is one single most important relationship you need to work on, in order to ensure happiness in all of your other relationships.”


David Parker presents religious literacy and bible courses posted at another history blog.

David Richeson presents Adventures in Everyday Life posted at 360 Degree Success, saying, “How to be yourself even with life’s incredible demands.”


Hueina Su presents Take Time for Friendships posted at Intensive Care for the Nurturer’s Soul, saying, “In our super-busy society, it’s easy to neglect the important relationships in our life. As I navigated through school, career, marriage and motherhood, I became more and more appreciative and grateful for my old friends. No matter how busy you are, I hope you take time to nurture the significant friendships in your life.”


J Bradley presents Rob 4/4/2007 posted at TAMPA TWO.

Wenchypoo presents This Thing Called “Global Warming” posted at Wisdom From Wenchypoo’s Mental Wastebasket, saying, “Soon to be a societal/cultural issue the way certain people keep bringing the whole non-issue into the media foreground! Even the U.N. is falling for this B-S.”

David Richeson presents Are You Sure You Know What You Really Want? posted at 360 Degree Success, saying, “How do you live you own life when you are being manipulated continuously?”

That concludes this edition. Submit your blog article to the next edition of standing in the gap using our carnival submission form.
Past posts and future hosts can be found on our blog carnival index page.

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Losing a Generation

April 26th, 2007 Viewed 4164 times

It has only recently become evident that the key to changing society was through the next generation.  For many years, Christians watched as the Bible and Godly morals were questioned and removed from our schools and we got somewhat upset, but did not realize the full impact of the replacement.

Now, many wage their battles with our children in the schools, and many have removed their children from the schools altogether– realizing just how powerful having the time every day to expose children to values in this way is.

Oh Be Careful Little Tongue

April 25th, 2007 Viewed 2032 times

Cafe Conversation

If you’ve taken any time to read all the sites out there that talk to you about blogging, how to get people to comment on your blog, and how to get listed and do well in social networking sites, you no doubt have seen a tip that reads something like this:

Say something controversial.

For people in the media business, this is something that many of them do.¬† Sometimes it’s via the positions that they take, for others it’s the names that they call people.¬† In still others it’s how they dress and carry themselves.

In the past few weeks, a high profile radio personality (Don Imus) was let go from MSNBC and CBS supposedly for something he said.  Whether it was actually that, or a combination of race relations and the withdrawal of sponsorships has been already been talked to death.  What I want to focus on is the power and unpredictability of what you say and how you say it.

You see, there are many bomb throwers that walk the line in an effort to attract attention.¬† They give politicians names.¬† They insult or be brash/radical about their propositions.¬† And if you agree with what they’re saying about the other person, you can’t help but laugh or smile.

I installed this greasemonkey script called “Keep Republicans Laughing” and it replaced every instance of some politicians names with their “Rush Limbaugh” substitutes.¬† I admit, I found it amusing when I wasn’t trying to figure out if it was the real text.

But my friend and coworker pointed at it and wondered why I would shrink to name calling.  Part of me hearkened back to my youth when I was in high school and said that if a person cannot have thick enough skin to let things like that just fall off them then they are no more than children.

But, should I be name calling?  Especially as a Christian?  Certainly not.  I have removed that script from running on my browser, and told my coworker that I was wrong, but we need to be really careful that our tongue (and our words on the screen) speak well of ChristРthat they carry His love to all, regardless of whether we agree.

Explaining Salvation to a Child

April 24th, 2007 Viewed 3141 times


My children believe that any person wearing metal armor or a head piece is¬†a “Men-o-Knight”.¬† So, you can imagine the smiles that crack on people’s faces when they talk about dressing up as “Men-o-Knights” and fighting with swords.¬† This took a whole different turn, however, when they brought home a paper from Sunday School that had Jesus on the cross, surrounded by Roman soldiers.

“The Men-O-Knights killed Jesus,” my oldest one said.¬† You can’t help but wonder what Mennonites think of this accusation.¬† But hence the challenge of explaining why Jesus had to die to younger children.¬† They are concerned about “the ouchies in Jesus hands” and they want to give Him a hug, but they cannot yet grasp the concept that He had to die because they did wrong.

This realization is something that we all must come to.¬† At some point we must all realize that it wasn’t the Jews, the Romans, or anyone else that put Christ on the cross– it was all of sinful men.

It was for the rebellion that we expressed.¬† It was for the disobedience we do every day.¬† It’s for the ungodly thoughts we have and the things that we do in the flesh.¬† Our sin sent Jesus to the cross out of His love for us.

We must first realize we are sinners in order to see our need for a Savior.

Learning a New Way of Life

April 23rd, 2007 Viewed 2598 times

A majority of problem with getting and staying out of debt is actually getting to the place where you realize that the way that you currently think about money has got you into this hole, and without a change in the way that you’re thinking you don’t have a chance to get and stay out.

Our culture has gotten to the point that kitty cats and dead people can get approved for credit.¬† This was dramatically displayed by¬†a television commercial for Master Card.¬† In the commercial, a zoo keeper has a cough, but leaves his Master Card behind in the elephant’s place.¬† What does the caring elephant do, but go out and use Master Card’s new technology (and the zookeeper’s card) to buy soup, cough medicine and a blanket– awe.

The kicker?¬† The elephant doesn’t return the card, or tell the zookeeper how he purchased the item, so just about the time the zookeeper’s feeling better and notices that his card is gone, he’s getting charged 25% interest on that $100.00 worth of medicine because he didn’t leave his insurance card with the elephant either.

Why the Bible Presents a Problem

April 22nd, 2007 Viewed 2131 times

Open Bible

One of the unique things about the Bible is one of the hardest things to refute.  What I refer to is the amount of material it represents over the time period that it represents.  The fact that it represents all of timeРbeginning at the beginning and then not going silent except between a period of the Old Testament and the arrival of Jesus of Nazareth on the sceneРmakes it difficult to say that it contains no value, and the historical quality makes it difficult to ignore what it claims about history.

This is because the Bible contends to not just tell what happened, but why it happened, and Who was behind it.  If the Bible were to have stayed with just talking about what happened, there would be no problem with accepting it.  That it claims that an Almighty Being caused events to occurred means that a hard task of attempting to discredit the history has to be undertaken to nullify its message.

Take, for example, the time in Hezekiah’s reign in Israel where they were being attacked by the Assyrians.¬† Archeologists have found accounts in the Assyrian history that they tried to take Jerusalem but were unable to.¬† If the Bible had simply corroborated this story then everyone could be happy– but that’s not the case.¬† The Bible talks about Hezekiah praying, Isaiah interceding and the Lord destroying the whole army with an angel before dawn.

And that’s not the only time that the Bible claims that God did things for His own glory without any help:

  • Egypt- plagues, parting the Red Sea, and Manna
  • Jericho- army marches around a wall 7 days and it falls inward.
  • Gideon- defeats an entire army with 300 men, pitchers and torches
  • Jehosophat- is looking toward being destroyed only to have the invading armies turn on each other.
  • Other battles- God causes the sun to stand still.

And that’s just a small sampling.¬† This is the problem– that contrary to what the atheists of the day want to tell you– God wanted to let people know that He was involved.¬† In fact, I believe that one of God’s biggest desires for those that are called by His name is to get out of the way and let him be seen.

This is a problem.¬† God’s supposed to be someone that I cannot find, cannot talk to, and that is shy.¬† Unfortunately, the Bible paints something completely different– and also has a warning.¬† Those that seek for a sign are often the ones that cannot see it when it’s given.¬† Think Pharaoh in the Old Testament and the Pharisees in the new.

For those that believe– take heart:¬† God is at work today, just like He’s always been.¬† He may be more at work through people than in pillars of clouds, but He is still there.

For those that do not believe– take notice:¬† Each time you are shown God you’re given the chance to accept or reject.¬† Just like Pharaoh of old, though, the more you reject the less chance you have to see Him the next time– even if He uses something spectacular.


Standing in the Gap in a Society that's Warring with God.